Boulder looks on with pride as obese men in spandex appear to hit training milestone Jan25

Boulder looks on with pride as obese men in spandex appear to hit training milestone

“It seemed like a great match,” observed Roger Saplow, using his shoe to unroll a neighbor’s Daily Camera Monday morning. “Those guys look like they’ve been training hard.  Obviously, they have a ways to go before they’re in any kind of passable physical condition, but I’m proud of them for getting out there in the cold weather and getting their heart rates up.  You gotta start somewhere.”

Scientists find that talking about workouts offsets any exercise-induced cognitive gains

British researchers in 2015 used a database of information about the health and habits of twins to show that muscle health was linked to cognitive abilities throughout life.  However, a disturbing side effect was that many of the gains were offset by the amount a person talked about his or her exercise regimen. “We found a troubling amount of empty brain space in people who were physically inactive, in people who talked about their workouts, and in the people who got stuck listening,” according to the study.  The alarming results of the cognitive losses – over a year – were roughly equivalent to watching an entire season of Keeping up with the Kardashians.

Nation growing weary of waiting for far North Broomfield to connect to Sheridan underpass

For hikers, bikers, and runners and commuters alike — the Broomfield Trail just became more connected. “Broomfield residents who are growing tired of getting in their cars every time they want to pay a visit to the Sheridan underpass just got an early Christmas present,” said Cindy Aries, Deputy director of Broomfield Open Space and Trails at a ribbon cutting ceremony held earlier today. “This isn’t just a victory for dogwalkers and rollerbladers. It’s a victory for all of us who are ready to take the car culture out of suburbia.  Now, for families who want to go to Costco but don’t want to pollute the environment, there’s a better, carbon neutral option. And that option is a bicycle with a huge, huge cart dragging behind it.”

Cycling app takes guesswork out of measuring your worth as human being Aug31

Cycling app takes guesswork out of measuring your worth as human being

“Before Strava, people rode their bikes for fun and exercise,” said Strava spokesman Brian Denning. “And that was ok, except that going out and having a good time didn’t answer the question, how much better are you than other people?  For that kind of information, you had to rely on crude tools that didn’t involve icons of trophies or public rankings: tools like  Facebook, Instagram and whether or not you went to Middlebury. We set out to change all that, and we did it a lot better than anyone else, a lot better.

Fart is as excited as anyone about the end of yoga class

“I feel guilty saying this, but this yoga class had better end really fucking soon because I don’t know how much longer I can take this,” said a fart in Monday’s 6:00AM Vinyasa 2 class as it desperately  clutched the walls of Elaine  Rolling’s descending colon. “I don’t mean to diminish the importance of  yoga in my own spiritual and interpersonal growth, or my genuine affection for plow pose, but for the love of all things holy, please let me out of here.”

Hula hooper hopes to bring out inner pervert in everyone

“One of the things I like most about taking off most of my clothes, covering my body in oil and gyrating my hips is that it simultaneously screams “kids’ play time!” and “let’s have sex!” said Hula Hoop artist Geenya Moon-Star.  “It’s just this kind of conflation of childhood and adulthood that makes Hooping a perfect activity for fun-for-the-family events like daytime concerts, festivals or even just a sunny day on the walking mall when you think no one is going to be nude.  One second, you’re watching me and are reminded about how much fun you had hula hooping as a kid, and the next minute you’re watching me and wondering – well – if you really should have been doing this as a kid.”